Luan Special's Halloween Stories Part 1
by Anthony Staffenhagen
Summary: 1st story: Lola's Nightmare (But in the Morning)


Lana Special sat on a throne with a big huge book on her lap.

Lana: I still don't understand what the purpose of this is.

Lana's younger sister Luan walked up to her.

Luan: I've explained this like 5 times already. There's this cliché where someone tells multiple non-canon short stories that are horror related for Halloween. We're doing that cliché but with a twist. The stories are actually canon. Canon to the Y Universe, that is.

Lana: What does "canon" mean?

Luan: That's not important. Just read what I wrote in that book.

Lana: But it's just introducing the stories. How could you forget to write the stories?

Luan: I didn't. You just need to read the introductions and then the stories will tell themselves.

Lana: Then what's the point of me being here?

Luan: It adds atmosphere.

Lana: Atmosphere? Do you even know what that word means?

Luan: Do you?

Lana: Yeah. And it has nothing to do with telling Halloween stories.

Luan: Uggh. Forget it. Just tell the story of when you got your braces off.

Lana: But you said the stories had to be horror related.

Luan: That is horror related.

Lana: How?

Luan: Never mind. I'll tell it.

 **The Insane Retain**

Lana was at the orthodontist and had just finished getting her braces off. Honestly, I have no idea why she had braces in the first place. I mean, she has a giant buck tooth that sticks out of her mouth. Why would someone wanna keep their teeth that way? Sorry, I got off topic. Now where was I? Oh yeah.

The orthodontist gave Lana two small blue plastic cases with something inside them.

Orthodontist: Here are your retainers. Wear them all the time except when you're eating, brushing your teeth, or flossing. After a while, you'll only have to wear them AT NIGHT.

Lana: Okay. How long will I have to wear them for?

Orthodontist: The rest of your life.

Lana was surprised by how casually the orthodontist said that.

Lana: You're kidding, right?

Orthodontist: NO! You must put these uncomfortable pieces of plastic in your mouth each and every night until the day you DIE!

Lana screamed in fear.

 **The End**

Luan: Do you understand now, sis?

Lana: No. Having to wear my retainers every night forever is annoying, but it's not horror related.

Luan: It. Is. A. Joke! You stupid, uncultured…Never mind. I don't know why I had faith that you could help me with this. Leave my presence!

Lana angrily left.

Luan: Can I get somebody more perfect than my lame sister to do this?

Someone hiding in shadows that appeared to be King K. Rool appeared in front of Luan. He took off his disguise, revealing that he was actually King Dedede.

King Dedede: You were expecting King K. Rool but it was me, Dededio!

Luan (while clapping): Excellent meme usage, King Dedede.

King Dedede: Can you get somebody more perfect than your lame sister to do what?

Luan: I just want you to sit on that throne and…

King Dedede: Done!

King Dedede sat on the throne and laid back.

King Dedede: This is incredibly easy, but I will still demand a payment of at least 100 trillion D-Bills within the next 5 minutes.

Luan: I also want you to read that book.

King Dedede: What?! In that case, make it 500 trillion.

Luan: Deal. Read it out loud please.

King Dedede opened the book. He kept flipping through all of the pages at the start of the book, seeing that they were all blank.

King Dedede: Is there anything written in here?

Luan: It's all in the middle of the book because for some reason, nobody ever reads any other part. I get why they do that in cartoons, but it seems to happen in live action stuff too, which is just weird.

King Dedede found the right page of the book and started reading it. The lights dimmed and fog filled the room.

King Dedede: Welcome to Luan Special's Halloween Stories! Gather round and I shall…

King Dedede stopped reading.

King Dedede: Did you write what this book says?

Luan: Yes I did. I'm very proud of it.

King Dedede: Sorry girly, but this is suckier than Kirby! I mean that in more than one way.

King Dedede threw the book at Luan's face.

King Dedede: Dedede out!

King Dedede jumped through the roof and left.

Luan: *groan* If you want something done right, you gotta do it yourself.

Luan got up on the throne and started reading the book.

Luan: Welcome to Luan…Oh, who am I kidding? The moment's gone now. This first story's called Lola's Nightmare (But in the Morning).

 **Lola's Nightmare (But in the Morning)**

Lola Loud woke up on the morning of Halloween and got out of bed.

Lola: I'm hungry. Maybe Lincoln will make me a deviled egg.

She walked past her sister Lana's Froakie as she went to get dressed.

Lola: Morning, Hops.

Hops: Froakie?

Hops found it very strange that Lola would talk to him.

Lola opened the door to the closet and reached her hand out for a pair of Lana's overalls. Then she realized what she was doing.

And then she screamed at the top of her lungs.

From their room, Lisa and Lily could hear the screaming. But then again, how could they not be able to?

Lily was in the closet, getting her Halloween costume on.

Lily: I wonder what Lola's screaming about.

Lisa: Likely something only a person with low intelligence would be bothered by. So, are you almost finished putting on your choice of garments worn specifically for celebration of the holiday that is held at the end of October, street name: Halloween costume?

Lily: I don't get why you're so interested in it, but yeah, I'm done.

Lily stepped out of the closet and her costume was Dr. Fox.

Lisa: That's your Halloween costume? One of the Super Bowl Not Pokémon?

Lily: No. Because that's not what they're called.

Lisa: But yesterday when you said…

Suddenly, Lola stormed into the room, now wearing her usual day clothes. She ran up to Lisa and grabbed her.

Lola: WHAT DID YOU DO TO ME?!

Lisa: I don't believe I have done anything to you, older sibling.

Lola: Lily, get out of here. Now!

Lily: No problem.

Lily left the room.

Lisa: Now older sibling, calm down and tell me what is causing you to be so angry.

Lola: I'm…I'm…I'm…

Lisa: You're what?

Lola: I'm turning into Lana!

Lisa: What?! How could that be? Explain your issue in detail.

Lola: When I got out of bed, I said "Good morning" to Hops, I mean Lana's Pokémon, then I almost put HER clothes on instead of mine.

Lisa: That is nothing to be concerned about. You simply enjoy Lana's Pokémon's company now and you momentarily didn't think hard enough about what you typically wear.

Lola: Then how do you explain how even though I'm wearing my clothes, it feels extremely wrong? Or that I keep calling it a "weird sparkly towel" instead of a…a…Oh, what's the word?

Lisa: A dress?

Lola: Yes, that! I think.

Lisa: Perhaps you have some sort of brain damage. Did you suffer any blows to the head recently?

Lola: Cut the crud. Obviously that purple stuff that was in your room yesterday did something to me.

Lisa: I can neither confirm nor deny that there was ever anything purple in here.

Lola: I can.

 **Halloween Flashback**

Lisa and Lily were in their room. Lisa had a hazmat suit on.

Lily: I'm gonna go see if Leni's finished making my Halloween costume. Wanna guess what it is?

Lisa: Negative. I have no time for such unimportant…

Lily: Here's a hint. It's someone I really like who's a genius.

Lisa was touched because she thought Lily was talking about her.

Lisa: ….My goodness. Youngest sibling, that is such a…

Lily left.

Lisa went back to what she was doing. She mixed an orange chemical with a green one, which turned into a yellow chemical with a purple mist coming out of it.

Then Lola came in.

Lola: Lisa, have you seen my…?

Lola started coughing because of the mist. Then she smiled and her eyes started moving around in an unusual way.

Lola: Whoa! I don't what know this purple stuff is, but it's so…..adjective. You're gonna have to verb this noun more adverb, person in room (female).

Lola fell backwards and passed out.

 **End of Halloween Flashback**

Lisa: I hadn't realized you had entered the room. I must have failed to remember to lock the door. My apologies.

Lola: I don't want you to apologize, I want you to fix me!

Lisa: I'm afraid I cannot. I disposed of that chemical compound due to my experiments concluding that it served no purpose. I now see those results were incorrect.

Lola: Why does that mean you can't fix me?

Lisa: Because I cannot develop an antidote for your issue without being able to study the chemical compound that caused said issue.

Lola: Then just make it again.

Lisa: That is not doable either. I used the necessary chemicals in their entirety.

Lola: And why can't you get more?

Lisa: Let's just say I never should have had them in the first place.

Lola: So what you're saying is that you're completely useless to me. Do I have that right?

Lisa: Affirmative.

Lola: Luckily for me, there's somebody else smart enough to know what to do.

Lola turned around to walk out of the room.

Lisa: Enough with the vague descriptions of geniuses! Who are you talking about?

Lola: Lisa Special.

Lisa: No! You are not going to get assistance from her!

Lola: You can't tell me what to do!

Lisa: If you ask her to aid you in this dilemma, there will be severe consequences.

Lola: You'd rather me turn into Lana than get help from someone you're jealous of?

Lisa: I am not jealous of Lisa Special. I simply find her obnoxious.

Lola: Well, I'm calling her anyway. So you're gonna have to deal with it.

Lisa: That will not be necessary. I will attempt to undo the effects my experiment has had on you.

Lola: You said you couldn't.

Lisa: I will see what I can do. Now go wait in your bedroom. I suggest you avoid any form of contact with Lana until I have returned you to normal.

Lola: Ok. Good thing she had a sleepover at her friend's house last night. She shouldn't be home for a while.

Lola went back to her room.

Lola: Let's see. What should I do to pass the time? I could tune up Vanzilla, or I could go roll in some mud, or…

Lola slapped herself.

Lola: No! You are not Lana! You are Lola!

Hops: Froakie Froak?

Lola: Yes, I'm talking to myself. You stay out of this! Wait a minute, how did I understand what he said?! Okay, I gotta calm down. I'll watch some game shows. That'll get my mind off this.

Lola turned on her cell phone and started watching a game show on it.

Lola: Man, this weird sparkly towel is so uncomfortable.

Lola looked in the closet and stared at Lana's overalls.

Lola: Maybe I should put on… No! I'm not gonna do it. I'm not gonna do it. I am NOT going to do it!

Lola took off her dress, tiara, and footwear and put on one of Lana's shirts and a pair of her overalls.

Lola: Ah! This feels so much better.

Lola turned off the game show and started watching Toilet Casual Wars instead.

Then Lisa ran into the room with a bucket.

Lisa: Warning! Caution! Your twin is home!

Lola: Already?

Lisa: Here, put this on.

Lisa put the bucket on Lola's head and then ran away. Then Lana came in.

Lana: What's with her?

Lana noticed Lola. Lola became very nervous.

Lana: Lola, is that you?

Lola couldn't give an answer because Lisa said she shouldn't make contact with Lana.

Lana: Yep, it's you. There's the birthmark on your foot. What are you doing wearing my clothes? You weren't gonna be me for Halloween, so…Did you decide it was time for a new outfit?

Lola still couldn't respond. She was now wishing she had resisted the urge to change out of her clothes.

Lana: That must be it. You wouldn't be so afraid to admit it if it were something else. And I must say, it's about freaking time! I always kept this to myself to be nice, but your old clothes were so stupid looking.

Lola was mad about what Lana had said, but she couldn't say anything about it.

Lana: Is that why you got a bucket on your head? I like it. Can I try it on?

Lola: …..

Lana: Okay, you're gonna have to say something. You're starting to creep me out.

Lola: …..

Lana: Are you okay, sis?

Lana touched Lola on the shoulder. A white flash of light filled the whole room. When it cleared, Lola bent over and the bucket fell off her head. Lana couldn't believe what she saw.

Lola now had a hat that was just like Lana's, as well as Lana's hairstyle, shoes, and voice. Lola had made the complete transformation into Lana. I'm still gonna call her Lola though.

Lana and Lola: What the butt?! Lola, what happened to you?! Why are you me now?! What's going on here?

Lisa came in.

Lisa: I told you not to call her!

Lana and Lola: I didn't call anyone. And we've got bigger problems here.

Lisa: I can see it has taken full effect now.

Lana and Lola: What are you talking about?

Lisa: An experiment I was working on yesterday has turned Lola into you. And it appears she can't remember she's Lola.

Lana and Lola: I guess that's why she keeps saying the same things I'm saying.

Lisa Special, who was still a computer, came in.

Lisa S.: Lisa, I believe you're misunderstanding why I…

Lisa S. noticed Lana and Lola.

Lisa S.: Why are there two Lanas?

Lisa L.: You can't figure that out based on what Lola called you about?

Lisa S.: Lola never called me. I'm here because my sister Lucy left me a note saying she wanted to show me something.

Lana and Lola: You have a sister named Lucy?

Lisa L.: Does everyone in your family have the same name as someone in mine?

Lisa S.: Yes.

Lisa L.: Well, she isn't here. If she was, wouldn't we know?

Lisa S.: Not necessarily. She likes to hide from other people as much as possible. I'm sure she's around here somewhere. Now why are there two Lanas?

Lisa L.: One of them is actually Lola. I accidentally turned her into Lana while I was experimenting yesterday.

Lisa S.: I can likely help with this. May I please have more detail about what experiments you were doing?

Lisa L.: No. I can handle this myself.

Lisa S.: I'm sure you can, but this is a serious issue. We need to turn Lola back to herself as soon as possible. The two of us both working on a solution will make this go by quicker.

Lisa L.: …Fine. Here's the list of chemicals I was working with.

Lisa L. gave Lisa S. a piece of paper and she read it.

Lisa S.: Well, the cause of the problem is obvious. You exposed Lola to spookyscaryskelogen.

Lisa L. started laughing.

Lisa L.: That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard.

Lisa S.: You've never heard of spookyscaryskelogen?

Lisa L.: I've never heard of it because there's no such thing.

Lisa S.: Yes there is. It's a gas that causes people to live out their worst nightmare.

Lana and Lola: So, Lola's worst nightmare is being me? That's…not very nice.

Lisa S.: I'm sure there are things she would find scarier, she just hasn't dreamt any of them. Now, to cancel the effects of the spookyscaryskelogen, all we need to do is get Lola to think of something scarier than being Lana. Which one of you is Lola?

Lana and Lola pointed at each other.

Lana and Lola: No, you're Lola.

Lisa L.: Whichever one is Lola doesn't know it.

Lisa S.: Then we'll just have to scare both of them. Lanas, I want you to imagine that you're in another universe.

Lana and Lola: Okay?

Lisa S.: This is a universe where the entire world is in a massively severe drought. This means there is no mud anywhere!

Lana and Lola: *gasp*

Lisa S.: On top of that, Pokémon do not exist, not even in fiction. But it gets worse.

Lana and Lola: What could be worse than that?

Lisa S.: Everyone poops and pees outside. Toilets have gone obsolete and not a single one can be found anywhere!

Lana and Lola screamed in fear.

Lisa S.: That ought-a do it. Lola should once again be Lola very soon. Sorry for having to scare you like that. Let me go get you some candy.

Lisa S. went downstairs and into the kitchen.

Lisa S.: Lucy, are you in here?

Lucy Loud popped out of nowhere.

Lucy: Yes I am.

Lisa got scared by that.

Lisa: Not you. I meant my sister.

Lucy: Does she look like a fusion between my sister Lynn and myself?

Lisa: Yes.

Lucy: Haven't seen her.

Lisa: …Riiiiight. So, does Halloween exist in this universe?

Lucy: It's tonight. I am very, very excited for it.

Lisa: Is today October 30th?

Lucy: No, it's October 31st.

Lisa: Interesting. October doesn't have 31 days in my universe.

Lisa looked at a calendar hanging on the wall to take a look at months that come before October.

Lisa: In this universe, September has 30 days and October has 31 instead of the other way around like in mine.

Lucy: I don't care.

Lisa got two pieces of Halloween candy out of the pantry.

Lucy: What do you think you're doing?

Lisa: I told Lola and Lana they could have some candy because I had to scare them. Lola was turned into Lana by spookyscaryskelogen and that was the only way to turn her back to normal.

Lucy: That's where you're wrong. I'm the one who turned Lola into Lana.

Lisa: How?

Lucy: With this spell book I found.

Lucy held out a withered brown book that said "SPELL! Spell! Spell. Whatever, I don't care." on the cover.

Lucy: I also used it to give Lola false memories. She thinks she was in Lisa's room yesterday instead of wherever she actually was, which may have been Lisa's room. Who knows?

Lisa: I'm one of the few geniuses who doesn't deny the possibility of magic being real. I still feel it was Lisa who turned Lola into Lana, but you had better come with me just in case. You're willing to change her back, right?

Lucy: I suppose. I would like to try out more of the spells.

Lisa and Lucy went to the twins' room. Lucy opened the spell book.

Lucy: Chanverse Towou Lyslo Gussei!

Lola didn't turn back into herself.

Lisa L.: What on earth was that?

Lucy: A spell to turn Lola back to normal.

Lisa L.: It obviously didn't work.

Lucy: Give it a moment.

Lisa S.: Here's that candy I said I'd get.

Lisa S. gave the twins each a different kind of candy. After Lola took a bite of her candy bar, she turned back into herself.

She was once again in her normal clothes with her usual hairstyle and had her voice back.

Lola: Oh, what happened?

Lana: You turned into me.

Lola: I did? I didn't do anything…..dirty while I was you, did I?

Lana: Define "dirty."

Lisa S.: All you did was stand around and talk. Nothing to worry about.

Lola: Good.

Lana: So is this whole thing over now?

Lisa S.: Indeed. The real question is this. What fixed it, science or magic?

Lisa L.: Science. There's no such thing as magic.

Lucy: Yes there is.

Lisa S.: I had better go look for my sister now. Happy Halloween, everyone.

Lisa S. went outside.

Lisa S.: Lucy, are you out here?

Garbage Man: Hey, weird floating computer.

A garbage man carrying Lucy by the neck of her shirt walked up to Lisa.

Garbage Man: Does this belong to you?

Lisa: Yes. "Belong to me" is not the correct terminology, but I know what you meant. Where was she?

Garbage Man: In the recycle bin.

The garbage man dropped Lucy and drove off.

Lisa: Why were you in the Loud family's recycling bin?

Lucy: Because I thought it was the garbage can, where I belong.

Lisa: What makes you say that?

Lucy: That other Lucy is so much better at being Goth than me. Her hair covers her eyes, mine doesn't. You should read her poems. Mine are like bad rap songs compared to hers.

Lisa: You didn't need to say "bad" in that sentence. That was redundant. So what was that thing you wanted to show me?

Lucy: I found a spell book earlier and I was gonna use it in this universe so I wouldn't have to face the repercussions.

Lisa: Except you would have had to.

Lucy: It doesn't matter anyway. When I met Lucy Loud, I had to give it to her. Her Goth superiority made me realize I don't deserve it.

Lisa: Hey, cheer up. Let's go home and celebrate Halloween. It's still your favorite holiday, right?

Lucy gave a teensy, tiny, basically microscopic smile.

 **The End**

Luan: One story down, two to go.


End file.
